Not All Straight Lines: A Personal Reflection on avoiding burnout, breaking down Stigma & What Yoga Really Means

The exhaustion from a night in hospital with my daughter has crept in.
And after a heavy start to the week, I’m thankful I took Wednesday to slow down to feel what needed to be felt, to breathe in the sun, and to process and release some big emotions. Because if I hadn't of taken that time, today would look a lot different. 

What I’m learning over and over again:
Life is not all straight lines.
It’s spirals, like natures seasons, twists and turns just like our roads
Mountains and valley's like the peaks and pits of our lives. 

We want it to be tidy, black and white, but real life happens in the grey.

I’m constantly reminded of the importance of self-care. It's what I'm so passionate about. But there is a Silent pressure no one talks about.

Living in a small town, there’s a quiet pressure of my own making to put on a brave face.
Keep showing up and not let anyone down.

When you’re a one-woman show, if you don’t show up… no one will.
But here’s the truth I’ve had to face lately:

Even as someone who teaches others how to reconnect with themselves —
I forget to do the same, the social pressure, my own pressure to perform has shown the cracks. And honestly? I can’t hide them anymore.

The fatigue, the heaviness — they’re not just signs of being tired. It's depression. 

I like may other women, put others first. There is this unwritten word that we "have" to do it all because that’s what we’ve been wired to do. I know, deep down and I say it repeatedly; "We can have it all, just not all at once." 

It’s a deep, ingrained conditioning — part cultural, part ancestral, part biological — this need to care, to tend, to make sure everyone else is okay before we even glance towards ourselves. These lessons, that we keep revisiting, they are obviously lessons that we missed the first time. 

And because of my own denial, my depression has quietly returned. But it feels different. It isn't heavy and I'm not spiralling like I once would. There is a lot of clarity of my direction, and the missteps I've been taking. The Path is clear, and I know what I have to do.  

The Stigma Runs Deep Even in Wellness. There’s still so much stigma around mental health.

And to be completely honest? It’s been embarrassing to admit.
Because when you’re a yoga teacher, there’s this narrative that you’re supposed to have it all together.
That you must always be regulated. That your nervous system is finely tuned. That you don’t get overwhelmed — you breathe through it, right?

That’s the story. But not the truth. 

After admitting to myself that I've not been ok, I have began to pivot and transition to something that does feel sustainable and more aligned with my values and goals. 

I've become fully aware of my symptoms, and that how I've been putting myself out there is not sustainable, for me or my family. This week was challenging and I'm so thankful that I stopped and created some intentional space to move and breathe on my own terms. To sit with the uncomfortable.

It’s in those small, deliberate pockets of stillness that stress and tension can start to move… and eventually release.

Because if we don’t give it space?
It compounds into something much bigger, and that's the big goal— to protect our health and wellbeing, not just keep going at all costs.

Yoga Was Never Meant to Be Perfection

Yoga isn’t about pretending you’re okay. It’s not about transcendence or bypassing what’s real.

Yoga is not about being on a pedestal. It’s not about having it all figured out.

Yoga is a practice.
A returning.
A way of witnessing yourself — even in the mess.

At its core, yoga is a system of self-awareness.
It teaches us how to sit with discomfort, not run from it (my goodness there was a hot moment of fight or flight this week, but it was yoga that shifted it!) 
It reminds us to breathe into what feels hard, not numb it.
It doesn’t ask us to be better, it invites us to be honest.

It’s not about fixing — it’s about feeling.
Not about striving — but softening.
Not about perfection — but presence.

The essence of yoga is union — mind, body, spirit.
And sometimes, that union means falling apart before we come back together again.

Honestly, I feel embarrassed. Because I feel like I've been here before, but haven't we all? Revisiting old ways, learning new lessons. Circling back — not because we failed — but because there was still more to see.

We are all human, having human experiences.
And it’s what we take forward from those experiences that matters the most.

A Reminder, If You Need It

If you’ve been struggling lately, if the weight feels like too much —
Let this be your reminder:

✨ You are not broken, you are human
✨ You don’t have to hide it, there are people who care for you deeply ready to listen
✨ You don’t need to be “better” to be worthy. Because you are fucking amazing just as you are!

I’m not sharing this for sympathy — I’m sharing it to take just one small brick out of the wall of silence and shame that still surrounds mental health.
Especially in wellness spaces.

The Next Chapter

I became aware of my mental health a couple of weeks ago. I knew I have to pivot, and readjust and transition to my next phase that feels more aligned and more like me. That’s why I’ve made the decision to gently scale back my live teaching days. Not to disappear, but to create space.
Space to honour what my family and I need. Space to realign with the bigger vision I’m being called to bring to life.

For you. For my family.
For the future of YouRise Yoga.

I’m working closely with my mentor behind the scenes to bring this next chapter to life. There will still be live classes — but fewer, and with deeper intention.

Because sustainable, aligned, soul-led work takes space. And heart. And truth. 

And I’m choosing all three.

Thank you for reading this far.
For being in this community.
For walking beside me — even when the path spirals.

With love,
Peta x